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Sunday, May 20, 2012

One Post for the Weekend

So yesterday I drove all around the planet and when we finally got home I was too exhausted to write. I was in bed by 10:30pm. That of course meant that at 6:30am I was wide awake. I hate that. I miss the days of sleeping in on the weekends...

We had a full day Saturday. The kids had their visits, Gabby has to go to the doctor for an ear infection, Gabby and Jelly bean has a psychiatrist appointment and then we headed to the outlet mall to get some things for our trip.

While at the visit Little Mama called me from her Mom's cell phone. Of course she used my real number and not the Google Voice number I set up (because I didn't tell the kids about the Google Voice number). It was odd.

"Hi Mom! We are having so much fun."

Ok?!!? "Good. Glad to hear it but you really need to get back to your visit with your Mom."

So when she got home we asked her what happened. And she actually told me. The kid who avoids and can stay silent actually spilled! Her and Gabby were fighting. They didn't feel Mom was handling it right. They were upset. She just wanted me help but then couldn't ask for it in front of her Mom.

This led to a tearful conversation about the fear about Mom not getting to the reunification goal. Apparently, Mom also mentioned to them that if they do get adopted she would be happy to have us be the adoptive family because she would still be in their life. She also told them that if they go home we will still get to see them.

I'm glad she is reinforcing the support system we are setting up but I didn't know if the visit is the place to talk about this. Perhaps family therapy with the guidance of the therapist would be better. I don't know maybe I'm just annoyed that I had two kids in tears after just 2 hours.

She covered a lot of ground in the two hour visit because she also managed to tell them that they will no longer be seeing their trauma therapist.

This is where she loses the battle. Not understanding that there are ways and times to discuss things. Their therapist should be the one to approach this with them. It created mistrust between me and the kids because I didn't tell them - and now they are wondering what else I know that they don't.

I don't know what she was trying to accomplish by telling them. If it was to show she's interested and included or because she hates that therapist or if she was trying to undermine me. It confuses me. I guess this will be worked on in family therapy but this is 2 weeks in a row where Mom brought up information that the kids really shouldn't have been told.

I have more to write about the psychiatrist but that's for another day.

Today we head to my brother's college graduation. I am so excited for the girls to experience this. Ceremony, celebration, tradition. For school.

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