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Night 2 Down, 22 To Go

Yuck. That's all I can say. I'm so over the poor choices an ignorant behavior that I'm at a loss as to how to trudge forward.

The kids came home impossible Saturday. JB in the same clothes she left in on Friday morning but somewhere took a bath (with other clothes on) with her brother. I have no words for how that happens.

I've said all along I'm concerned that the sexual abuse history and tools to parent such have been minimized. If the tub incident isn't enough to highlight that, I'm not sure what is.

It also seems there is a serious lack of supervision going on in that these fights and tantrums are occurring and escalating to kids throwing objects at each other. I can appreciate ignoring the drama but you have to keep the kids safe too.

And because there wasn't much left of me last night and I told JB I was saying goodnight downstairs and not tucking her in - she threw stuff at the dog and escalated her behavior to the point of ripping her pajamas.

I want my kids back. These kids described above, can go home.


  1. This story is so hard for me to read. I can't imagine living it. All I've got is that I'll keep on praying for you!

  2. I feel u. Fostering is akin to being a the parent who has to give the kids to the non custodial parent for the weekend. You spent time and energy to put everything u have into your kids and just the mention of the other parent can undo years of hard work. You put in all your time and energy to do things "right " and at some point u wonder why bother. Well here is why. I hope it helps.

    Remember this until these kids met u they only knew one thing. The moms way. The time you put in might not change the way they choose to act today but in the long run it does give them a choice. They have the ability to say i know there is another way mom and i choosr that over this. I have been working with a little girl for2 years. She was days away from being fully potty trained and had been fully day and night weened for over a month from the bottle. 2 hrs with her mom she peed her pants and was sucking on a bottle. It kills me to se it. I just tell myself i am blessed to be able to give her my love and have her love me. I remember when she is acting out that she feels safe enough knowing she will not be beat to act out. When a child is comfortable with you ,unfortunately they show you the worst of them. I am sure some part of them is trying to push u away out if fear for loosing you as a copeing mechanism. Stay strong. They need a rock. Theres a good chance from what we are told she will loose them again and if you can handle it.they will be back in your care .


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