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Sunday, July 22, 2012

Thankful

Often I read posts about the loss of a support system to foster and adoptive families. Friends and families don't understand the chaos and confusion. They don't understand behaviors or mental illness and that often the best way to deal with these difficulties is the opposite of what makes sense to the majority of parents. They don't understand why you can't break routine "just this once" or why a babysitter may not be a possibility. Or they may not feel they can let the children into their lives to watch them walk away. We've been fairly lucky in this reguard. I had already lost the people who would have bailed when I went through my depression. The family that hasn't really understood what our lives are like now had already started to grow away from us. The hurt and confusion of people you love walking away had already been dealt with before the kids got here. We also have some pretty wonderful people in our life that cheer us on and worry with us and I wanted to take a moment to say how thankful I am for their presence in our life. I understand how rare that can be in foster/adopt land. We were with two of these people on Friday night. They called spur of the moment to see us and the kids. We went bowling. We sat outside near a campfire with some live music, great food, and a few drinks and laughed. Really laughed. I can't remember the last time all of us sat around a table happy and relaxed in our home town. These friends of our love our kids. They sat with me a few days after Jelly Bean was hospitalized. I was tipsy and the emotions of the week had gotten to me and I was crying. And they were crying with me. At two in the morning. So I wasn't by myself. I was grateful for the reassurances they gave then and they have been true to their word still. They are at every birthday and celebration and my kids love them back. They are an aunt and uncle even though we are not related but I wouldn't have it any other way. My Prayer tonight is that other families have good friends in their lives too. Especially when Things get rough. So that they feel supported and so their children can see what good friendships look like.

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