Stopping A Moving Train

So a change was made to the visitation schedule to start giving Mom more opportunity to parent her kids. We were going to put all 4 children together and have them do family visits 2 times a week. The first group visit was supposed to be for this Saturday for 3 1/2 hours per the conversation on Tuesday. The kids were prepped by their therapy team. The two oldest being very concerned about the amount of time.

Wednesday I get a call from the transportation/supervisor company. Can the visit be moved back. Then she tells me it's scheduled for 5 hours with them all together.

I flip out. Time and time again we prepare the kids and something else happens. The adults are loosing credibility fast and it's not helping the anxiety or behaviors lessen in our home. And you know what? I'm tired of being the one having to pick up the pieces when someone decides that the kids and us can handle the damage being done.

So even though we had an opportunity to keep things as they were I got a call this morning from case worker telling me that the visit will be all 4 kids for 5 hours and if Gabby needs to she can decide to leave early. WTF?

So I can be the scapegoat? So Gabby can outwardly show Mom she picks me over her? So Mom can have ANOTHER reason to dislike me? And what about the other kids. Don't they get an out if they need it? What's the message there- start having the runs or throwing up and you too can get out of the time with your Mom? And what happens next week? Does she get the out then?

I think it's official complaint time. I can't live like this. I can't keep them moving forward in their healing if others ate going to run right over me.

I don't think that I've ever really grasped the whole it's hard to stop a moving train phrase prior to now. Perhaps I need to just lay down on the tracks and watch it wreck.