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Tuesday, February 18, 2014

Self Care

People often talk about Self Care. But what does that actually look like? 

My first go round as a foster mom I wasn't very good at it. And I paid for it and so did my kids. When you are giving and giving and giving its really hard to fill your tank back up to give more. My Mom offered to help, I didn't take her up on it. I had this idea that I had to be the June Cleaver of foster moms. And then we added the level of need of my kids to all that and I was totally spent. 

This time around I'm not making that mistake. For one, I'm taking the help people are offering. My neighbor baked a dish for me? Happy to take it off her hands. My Mom willing to take the kids Sunday night instead of Monday morning? I'll drop them off at 6:30pm! 

Two weekends ago I went up to the spa and spent a night with some girlfriends. I splurged on a facial and a pedicure. I had 24 hours of adult conversation. It was great. Last weekend Hubby and I had a grown up dinner in a romantic restaurant.  

Do I feel guilty? Sure! I miss the kids. I want the bonding to continue. But I know that at the end of the day, they need me to be me. The patient, therapeutic Mom. Not the screaming and yelling crabby Mom because she can't even get to the bathroom in peace Mom. And it's a lot easier for me to be the Mom they need when I take time for myself.

Perhaps the biggest thing I have been doing for myself is setting a fitness goal. My fitness goal is to run a 1/2 marathon in June. I've been training for the last three weeks and I feel great. I've been using the fitness center at work and when I can't get there, I've been dancing with my Wii, Just Dance game. 

I set a big goal on purpose. I needed something that I had to work for but also something I could do for me. Something I could control. So much of my life the past year was out of my control, I needed something no one else could impact. I decide if I'm going to back my bag for work. I decide if I'm going to run or do yoga. 

What are you going to do for you this week? Leave a comment and let the readers applaud you!

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