Labels

ACR (1) acupuncture (1) adoption (30) Adoption; RAD; emotions; tantrum (1) adoptive families (4) Amazing people (2) anger (6) Anxiety (1) appointments (1) Attachment (4) Attachment therapy (1) babies (1) banging my head (8) Bed wetting (1) beds (3) bedwetting (3) behavior (25) bio families (2) bio parents (26) biological parents (5) Biological parents; adoption (3) Biological parents; adoption; co parenting (1) Bioparents (1) birth families (21) birth moms (1) birth parents (5) birthdays (3) blogging (5) Boundaries (4) CASA (1) caseworker (9) challenges (4) change (2) Changes (2) co-parenting (16) confessions (15) Consequences (2) Court (20) crafts (1) CW Visit (5) DCFS (9) decisions (3) diary (1) dicipline (1) drama queen (2) emotions (130) Fab Four (14) Fab Four: Post Reunification (2) faith (10) family (12) Family fun (9) family outings (7) family support (15) family therapy (4) feelings (7) fertility (2) flowers (1) food (1) foster care (25) foster parenting (83) Foster parenting; permanency (3) fun (1) Gabby (4) grief (9) healing (5) Holiday (8) Holidays (5) Homework (1) honesty (1) Hubby (2) husbands (3) If I'm being honest (5) illness (1) investigation (1) Jelly Bean (4) laughter (1) legal issues (4) licensing (2) Little Mama (2) loss (5) love (8) lying (1) marriage (1) meetings (1) meltdown (1) Mental Health (3) migraine (1) milestones (1) Mommy Humor (5) mother (1) motherhood (46) Movie review (1) Mr. Mohawk (7) music (2) names (2) Neglect (1) neurosarcoidosis (6) Nostalgia (1) nothing to do with foster care (8) Open adoption (2) organization (1) other people's reactions (7) Overnight visits (2) parenting (12) permanency (10) perspective (6) photolistings (1) photos (2) pictures (5) placement (1) Placements (23) Post Reunification (26) Post visit behavior (2) Post-reunification (5) PRIDE (1) progress (1) PTSD (5) puberty (1) Quartet (3) Questions (1) RAD (5) relationships (6) return home (1) reunification (11) safe haven (1) Sarah (3) sarcasm (1) school (10) Sexual abuse (4) shopping (2) sibling (1) siblings (5) Simon (6) sleep (1) Smiley (1) Social Media (2) Solana (5) Stella (1) stress (9) Suicide (1) support (5) tantrums (3) Team Work (1) Teamwork (5) Thank You (1) The Quartet (1) The System (2) Therapeutic parenting (2) therapy (19) TPR (7) training (1) Transition (10) transition plan (10) trauma (9) triggers (4) typical kids (1) Urine (1) verbal abuse (1) Visit behavior (3) visits (38) waiting (2) where to start (3)

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

I Get Knocked Down

The range of emotions I experienced today was ridiculous. I have felt overwhelmed, excited, happy, annoyed, disappointed, overwhelmed and then devastated. At 7:00 pm when I arrived home, I wasn't sure how much more I could take. 

The answer is: apparently some more because then I received a message from DCFS that they were sitting in front of my house at 4:30 needing to see my children. 

This is not a phone call anyone wants to get but it's almost guaranteed as a foster parent. The investigation because of a spiteful bio parent or a comment a child made that wasn't clear and the next thing you know, your kids are removed and you license is up for grabs.

This was the last thing I needed in the middle of a move. In the middle of Grad School. In the middle of running a 1/2 marathon in 21 days. In the middle of transitioning 4 kids to yet another school.

Of course this particular investigator was very hard to understand. After a few minutes though, I figured out we were not under investigation. Sheila is. She was accused of domestic violence against someone else and because she mentioned her children and they are in the report they have to do a well being check.

So they haven't seen their mother for 3 weeks and had no contact. Their last visit was supervised. They have seen their case worker (from your office and agency), their CASA worker, and their therapists and you need to see them anyway? To ask them what exactly.

"No questions. I just need to see them."

Seriously? What.is.the.point.of.that? 

So because Bio Mom got arrested and said her children's names I have to drop everything and meet with DCFS (again) this month so they can not ask my children questions? 

I told her she could meet us at the therapists' office tomorrow evening as my kids have been traumatized by enough interviews. I also demanded that she contact the Case worker. Then I emailed the team about this nonsense and the comment that the investigator felt this might impact next week's visitation plan.

I feel like all the energy just left my body after I hung up that call. Then Smiley walked into the kitchen to handle a note about a project due Friday. Fantastic! 

So I checked Sheila's facebook. Sure enough, her cover photo is now an older photo of the kids. 

If you care so much, stop dragging them down with you. Let them be and quit causing them further stress and trauma. 

No comments:

Post a Comment