I missed you today. I though of all the fun things we did on our trips to Disney World. I pictured your reactions to the new things we tried and brainstormed a way to afford for us to do them all again. This time with your Mom included.
I took a step towards healing today. I realized that I no longer refer to you as my kids. You are now Maria's kids or The Kids. I spent a good amount of time wondering what the next kids will think when they join our family and if they will enjoy our trips as much as you did.
There is a place in my heart that still longs for you. But mostly it hopes that you are alright. While I am confident that you are where you should be I still worry that you are ok. That your Mom is ok. I wonder if that will ever really go away. I had no idea how deeply I could love. I no longer worry that I don't have enough to go around.
Foster Mom R