So the judge in the foster care case granted overnight visits Thursday. And the states attorney defended us from the accusation that we were trying to sabotage the goal. I'm not clear on what the issue was but the idea is ridiculous. 1) I don't need to help mom screws up just fine on her own 2) it would not score me any points with the kids 3) the only issues I raise are ones that have to do with the kids. I don't know how advocating for safety for them could be viewed as sabotage but I suppose someone has to be blamed. Might as well be me. The judge and states attorney defended us and actually stated that they feel "blessed" to have such supportive, loving, dedicated foster parents.
I didn't go. Hubby went. It's probably best. I was pretty upset afterward for a number of reasons but mostly because I love them and I have no idea how to start to say goodbye. And while I can admit that she is trying very hard, I still question if she's got enough tools to meet the needs of her kids. I guess we'll see when the visits start. The new plan includes Jelly Bean's therapist meeting with the family therapist and Mom and kids so that their feelings get brought up.
The criminal trial against the former foster parent was this week. The kids did great testifying and my little Jelly Bean set a precedent in the county. Never before have they allowed a victim to testify via closed circuit camera so that the victim isn't re-traumatized. But we gathered the right documentation and the states attorney made the right argument and her therapist testified on her behalf and the judge allowed it!
The experience was empowering for her and she handled it like a champ. LM also did fantastic. I was able to be at the reading of the verdict and I am happy I say that it was GUILTY. I watched him being taken into custody in handcuffs. It felt great to tell Jelly Bean that she and other kids were safer that night. We will also have a chance to write a victim impact statement for sentencing. He is also likely to be deported as he is a permanent resident and a class X felony will cause him to lose his status.
Long Overdue Update
Well hello there! It has been years since I've written and published a post and recently I've had the idea that maybe this year was ...
I am always at a loss for words when I read your posts. The idea that so many therapists still have to be involved just to help Mom function through an overnight visit seems outrageous to me. Yes, therapists should be involved. But at some point in time Mom is going to need to be able to navigate this parenting more so on her own.
ReplyDeleteAnd for the abusing foster family - praise God that ended as it should have!!