We are both Writing

Currently I am hiding in my room savoring the last few moments of peace and quiet I will get this morning. We bought a laptop since the computer was in the little guy's room and we found it challenging to use it at night when we actually have time. And since we have 4 children and our dog in our 2 bedroom loft townhouse we are simply out of space to move the computer to.

I have already broken up an argument, doled out tylenol (for sore breasts), discussed puberty and growth spurts and downloaded videos from vacation.

My husband got up early to help Jelly Bean write the sentences she was assigned last night for 1)calling another boy on the bus a B**** and 2)Lying about it 2 days ago when confronted. Because her Social Worker at school had her call and tell me about it when he got the notice from the bus driver.

Our two major rules are 1)Keep your hands to yourself. 2)Tell the truth. Punishment is doubled if you break either of these rules. Because Jelly Bean has been "grounded" from a lot of things we changed tactics with this punishment. As we have a big Memorial Day weekend planned this weekend we decided keeping her from participating would be ineffective. And boy were we right because when we sat down to talk about it with her she jump right away to "I know I'm not going...." WE said NO, instead you are going to write sentences. 10 - I will not lie, and 10 - I will not use bad words. But she escalated into a tantrum and by the end of it she had 100 sentences to write. And by the end of that she had to start over and eventually asked to go to bed understanding that if she didn't get it done in the morning she wasn't going to see Kung Fu Panda in 3 D with the family.

Now here's the rub - the other kids had lots to say about this. Mainly, that it wasn't fair that I was going to stay home with Jelly Bean because then THEY miss out on me. So the solution we came up to that was when they got home from the movie I would take the older girls to the scrap booking store.

The evening ended up with me crying. Frustrated that I feel like I'm failing this little girl who obviously is crying for help. Angry that a 7 year old gets me so worked up. Tired of the unknown and understanding that these kids are tired of it too. Wondering if this was the right decision in the first place and fearful of whatever outcome comes our way.

I got a good nights sleep and pretty soon I'm going to walk out of my room and feed these children and start the day all over again.